piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
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