So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
