Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
