Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
