is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Randomize
