i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
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