Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
You were trust falling into bushes
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
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