just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
