I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
