Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
