they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize
