you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
