We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
My penis needs a shock collar
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
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