i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
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