I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Randomize