It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Randomize