Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Randomize
