im about as happy as oj after his trial
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
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