About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
Randomize
