I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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