Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Randomize
