i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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