if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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