ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Randomize
