***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
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