Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Randomize
