Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
My breasts were aching with rage.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
