you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
