wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
