The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Randomize
