If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
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