how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
