I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Randomize
