Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
