Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
