I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize