remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Randomize
