So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Randomize
