No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize