How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
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