i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
