i think i have two assholes
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
