"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
