Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
Randomize
