I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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