New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Randomize
