May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
Randomize
