marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize
