her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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