Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
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