i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Randomize
